My Purpose Project

What is Perfection?

2011-04-29T11:04:00.006-04:00

By: Dora Nudelman

What is perfection and what pressures do we place on ourselves in our pursuit of it? This is a question that needs to be answered before we can truly enjoy our lives to the max.

Perfection is really a relative term. Everyone will have their own definition of it so in reality perfection is truly a matter of perception. Why do we strive to be perfect anyway, and why do we assume that we aren’t already?

We often strive to be perfect because our egos tell us that we are not good enough as we are. While it may be true that we have more to learn and more of ourselves to come into, we are already perfect in our own right. We were made perfect but it is our failure to see that that causes us to feel imperfect.

We create false standards for ourselves, definitions and labels, distinctions between good and bad, etc. Do you think of yourself as a good person or a bad person, and what makes one or the other so?

These are all questions you need to ask yourself so that you can realize the root of your insecurities. How can you think of yourself as perfect if you feel that you’re bad? What makes you “bad” anyway? Failure to pay your bills on time? Speaking your mind? Not getting a degree? Eating an extra helping of dessert? What do you consider as good and bad, and why?

We have to learn to be more loving and forgiving with ourselves as this is the only way we will be less judgmental of others. How can we truly love others if we ourselves do not love ourselves? Sure, on the surface it appears that we can, but underneath it all our love is laden with neediness.

So where do we get the idea that we are not perfect as we are? Who tells us that we need this or that in order to be perfect? Is it society? Is it our peers, family, friends, co-workers, the media? Well, it can be all of the above but it’s up to us to believe it or not.

What if instead of conforming to irrational standards of perfection, we simply focused on being our best selves, mistakes and all? What if we chose to focus only on our positive qualities and transform our ego qualities so that they too become one with our truth? Then we could focus on being our best, and doing our best, rather than keeping up with or comparing ourselves to others.

You are not automatically “bad” if your taxes are late or if you forgot to call your friend. Granted there is something to be said for being reliable and responsible, but failing to do so sometimes does not instantly make you a “bad” person. It may be a quality that you could work on so that you are as respectful to others as you can be, but it’s no reason to beat yourself up.

It’s ok to make mistakes. Mistakes are really learning experiences. If you make one the best thing to do is to rectify it if you can, or if not, to learn from it and change your future behavior because of it. Then you are working on coming into your best and true self, and you are doing so proactively. And who’s to say something is a “mistake” anyway? We don’t know for sure. All we can do really is aim to do what feels most authentic and what we feel is most respectful to ourselves and to others. If you slip up, get up and try again.

Stop trying to fit into a perception of perfection and you will release a lot of pressure and stress from your life. Aiming to be your best self is a lot different from being self-deprecating and unforgiving. Feel your inherent perfection and worth from within, from the true being that you are, and allow that to come through into everything you do. Rather than focusing on how perfect or imperfect you are, focus on the quality of what you are putting out and want to receive.

Stop judging yourself so harshly. Know that there are many reasons why you deserve to be loved and accepted, starting with the simple fact that you are a creation of The Universe. You are made of a beautiful and dynamic energy that causes you to be who you are. You only need to release your false ego self to see this truth.

Know that a lot of times we strive for perfection in order to get approval from others or to feel validated. We seek the opinions of others to make us feel good enough. “What will other people think?” we ask. Who cares?

What do you think of yourself? Why are you so hard on yourself? How can you feel compassion for others if you can’t give it to yourself? Stop trying to uphold a perfect image and just be yourself. In that way you will find your true perfection; the perfection that has always been there and that always will be.

Be Kind to Yourself

2011-02-08T18:13:00.003-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

When we react in a way that's instigated by our egos it's natural to feel guilty or regretful about our behavior. But when our buttons are pressed and we respond with anger or fear or depression it tends to make us feel like we've taken 10 steps back. That's especially true for those of us who have made it our mission to transform our ego natures into the true, loving beings that we really are.

This happened to me the other day. I reacted. With all the information I know, and teach, I still fell into a reactive moment. It kind of creeped up on me actually. I was surprised at myself. I felt, 'how could I react in this way knowing what I know?' And then it dawned on me...I'm human just like everyone else.

There comes a point in our spiritual development when we need to move away from the plight for righteousness and move towards true transformation. It's not about doing or saying the "right" things, it's about learning and growing, even if that means you screw up sometimes. All of us do it and it's nothing to get truly upset about.

It's especially hard when you place super high standards for yourself regarding "proper" conduct. It's fine to set the bar high, but you must also be forgiving of yourself if you slip up from time to time. Spiritual growth is not about being self-righteous or punishing. It's about being truthful and authentic to yourself, as well as being forgiving and accepting.

Being authentic means feeling what you feel and expressing yourself, but from a standpoint of understanding your feelings too, or at least being willing to do so. It's about taking responsibility for your actions and for the circumstances in your life, while also finding a more proactive way of dealing with your emotions and the behavior of others.

It's easy to blame others for "making" us feel bad. And it's easy to beat up on ourselves for not reacting in the "right" way. But what we need to do is realize that we are here to learn, grow, and experience life. Sure, we all want to get it "right" right away, but sometimes we side step, and that's OK too. We need to learn to give ourselves a break and to step away from being overly righteous and move towards being real.

Reaction Versus Pro-action

2010-12-02T09:42:00.002-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

It's become clear that our society today has become very reactionary. People today wait for their wake-up call before taking action, but at that point they've already endured some degree of suffering. But this doesn't make any sense. If we can be proactive in our lives, and avoid pain and suffering, why wouldn't we do that?

Is society lazy? Do people simply not think about the effects of their actions? Instant gratification leads to a play now, pay later mentality. However, the problem with this (among many) is that in the play stage people are living it up, but in the pay stage they are complaining.

You don't have to wait for a wake-up call in order to take action. What many do is give their power away, live in ignorance, and then complain if/when something unfavorable happens. But if you don't ask the questions, if you don't educate yourself, if you continuously allow others to set the stage in your life, do you really have the right to complain afterwards?

Reaction in the health care system, in security, in travel, with our environment, etc., all of these are indications of taking action after we've screwed up. Why can't we just be proactive and think ahead about the effects of our actions, government policies, and rules and regulations that don't make sense?

Take the latest issue with disinsection of planes travelling to certain countries. If you don't know, this is where the inside of the plane cabin is sprayed with pesticides before entering certain countries, many of which are countries much visited by tourists, and sometimes this is sprayed right on top of people. But does anyone ask about this or is it just taken for granted? We cannot just sit back and allow others to decide for us. We have a say, we just need to use it proactively. This doesn't mean starting a riot. It simply means asking questions and making choices like where you're going to vacation and whom you can speak to about this issue to voice your opinion (proactively and peacefully of course).

We cannot be held hostage to others' policies at our own expense. We must choose the best alternative and come up with a healthy compromise that's win-win. We cannot wait 10-20 years down the road or even sooner for studies to come out showing the possible negative effects of this procedure on people. We must do something proactively now, before anything negative occurs.

It's all about prevention, not reaction. Not to wait for terrorism to happen and then take precautions, not to wait for side effects to pull drugs and potentially harmful procedures. To look ahead, to recognize the potential ramifications ahead of time and do something to stop them simply by choosing another alternative. But this only happens when we ask questions instead of living in the dark. We need to be aware and then educate ourselves. This goes with drugs, foods, chemicals, policies, etc. We cannot close our eyes and then complain later.

You cannot plead ignorance anymore. There is just so much information out there. Of course it's important to expect the best and focus on positive things, because what you focus on the most becomes your point of attraction. But it's also important to educate yourself. It's a balance of staying positive in your focus, while being proactive and making choices from an educated standpoint. Because when you do, simply by making the better choices you help affect positive change. It's like this: if you notice someone's negative behavior but you continue to turn the other way you may not be participating directly in the activity, but you certainly aren't helping it. We cannot enable through ignorance.

Again, this isn't about acting out of fear. This isn't about consistently focusing on and fearing something negative. It's about expecting the best and doing something proactive that aligns with that expectation. It means expecting that your experience will be a positive one, but also making choices that you feel are most authentic and aligned with the truth. So in the case of choosing travel destinations, expect a great time but choose a place that you feel supports your beliefs and values as well, not because you are afraid of other places, but because you want to be supportive of those places you believe in.

It's not about fighting against anything. It's about being aware and doing something proactive about it. If that means choosing travel destinations that employ better measures and rewarding them for that, then do that. We have a lot of power if we use it correctly. If we stop purchasing things that harm then those things must change to accommodate demand. It's a simple supply and demand equation. Then in the absence of one method we discover a better one. If we look for better alternatives, we will find them, but only if we are willing to do so.

There is a better way, but as long as we don't question the old way, nothing changes. We wonder if we alone have any power to affect change. But we do. Each of us, one by one and together create a collective consciousness that affects change. But if none of us do anything and if none of us stand up for what we believe in, nothing will change. You must value your health, your family, your values, enough to say enough is enough and take a stand proactively instead of waiting for a wake-up call. Do not protest against what you don't like. Be an advocate for what you do like. Be supportive of those employing positive and fair measures rather than seeing it as boycotting something you don't like.

Stop giving your power away. Start educating yourself and start making proactive choices. Instant gratification and a play now pay later mentality is reactionary. Do something now and you will change your destiny for the better, not just for you but for others too.

"Should Be"

2010-11-19T10:00:00.001-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

If things don't go the way we want we automatically assume that things aren't as they "should be." But what does "should be" mean anyway? If something is, it is as it should be by the very virtue that it "is." It's there showing you that you're either aligned and on track or misaligned and off track. Everything is there for your personal journey. If things are the way they are there is a reason for it, so they are as they "should be." This doesn't mean you can't change them. It just means that there is a reason for them and that you can use the feedback you're getting to choose appropriate actions to align with what you truly love.

Seeking Approval

2010-10-14T18:39:00.003-04:00

By: Dora Nudelman

So often we base our opinions about ourselves and the decisions we make completely on how we think others will perceive us. This approach creates stress and struggle, not to mention disappointment. But we do not need to seek the approval of others in order to feel confident in what we choose to do and who we choose to be.

Self-confidence comes from within. It comes from a proactive appreciation of your true self, and the connection you have with the Source of all energy. You do not need others to validate your worth. You can certainly accept compliments graciously and criticism respectfully, but your true identity comes from an inner knowing that your true confidence and self-worth do not depend on anything or anyone outside of you.

You must know that you are already good enough. This doesn't mean you can't expand on your knowledge or grow your skills. It simply means that you are inherently deserving of your good and that you do not need to prove that to anyone. It means that you already have everything you need within you to succeed in life.

When you look at feedback as just that, feedback, you are then able to learn and grow from it without feeling the need to label yourself as "good" or "bad," "right" or "wrong." You can release your judgments and feel confident in the fact that you are authentically you.

It can be tough to feel confident if/when others do not approve of what you do, especially when you are invested in it. But you cannot base your sense of self and identity on others' opinions of you. Besides, the feedback you get from the outside world is only a reflection of your inside world. You may not see the connection, or you may not want to admit the connection, but the connection is there. Look for it. Figure out what thoughts and beliefs you have that are being reflected in one way or another through your external experiences.

Everyone wants to be liked and wanted, but when you let that become a desperate need, then your happiness becomes dependent on what others think of you. Respect that everyone is entitled to their opinions but also know that you do not need to take those opinions as your own. You can observe them from an objective point of view and see if there's anything you can learn, but then you can also choose to move on without being negatively affected.

When we act with approval being our main goal, we lose our authenticity, we become fearful, doubtful, and insecure, and we throw ourselves off our game for no good reason at all. But when we trust in ourselves, we can feel free to express ourselves without worrying about the feedback we will get. We're ready for it because we know who we are and what we have to offer, and we're ready to step up our game and learn more. When we let go of our attachments, agendas, and expectations, we are free to express ourselves in the moment and enjoy it for what it is.

You are not here to "make" anyone like you, accept you, want you, or the like. You are here to be the best version of yourself and allow the results to take care of themselves. You cannot control what others think or feel about you, but you can control how you feel about it.

If you stay authentic you will never doubt yourself again. Why? Because you are simply being true to yourself and basing your decisions on what resonates with you, with your soul, with your purpose the most. When you do this you cannot regret your decisions because they will have been made in trust and with responsibility in mind. Because you will feel internally at peace and happy, your outer world will rise up to match your inner climate.

Be yourself and those who love you will love you for you. And if some people don't love you for you, at least you were yourself. You can never regret that.

No Struggle Required

2010-09-19T16:02:00.001-04:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Struggle is not required. Struggle indicates a resistance to flow. If you feel stress, anxiety, desperation, and the like, you can be sure that you've stepped out of the flow (where all that exists is ease and joy).

Any time you are feeling stressed, or have the feeling at the pit of your stomach that just doesn't feel that great, ask yourself, "What outcome am I attached to right now? “What am I not getting right now that I want right now?" Then let go of your ego’s need for instant gratification and validation, and decide to surrender your desires to The Universe, decide to feel the essence of what you want as your reality now without needing to figure out right now how it will all come together. Trust in the bigger picture. Choose to release the struggle and step back into the joyous flow of life. Think of nature, think how natural nature is, how everything flows so effortlessly and without struggle.

In the moment that you become aware of your struggle, and you recognize that it's not necessary, this is the moment that everything changes for the better. It is the moment where you can say, "Thank you Universe for providing me with exactly what I need exactly when I need it. I trust you implicitly and ask that you guide all my actions with joy and ease."

Declare: "I trust The Universe. I relax and let go." Then go about your business with faith and trust and positive focus. Let go of any attachments you have to your desires and feel how complete you already are. Know that any desperation or impatience you feel is a direct result of ego's desire for instant gratification and that it comes only out of fear, doubt, and insecurity. If you have confidence in yourself and in The Universe, you naturally release the struggle. You are able to be patient and to trust that all is well as it is and you trust that all is always well.

To push, force, or manipulate creates struggle. It creates a sense of false urgency that is deeply ingrained in the ego. It involves a deep mistrust and as such, a need to micro-manage out of fear of lack. It completely disregards trust in the bigger picture.

But when you surrender and take inspired action when proactively prompted to do so, you are free to live in the flow of life with ease and joy, where everything feels authentically good and goes smoothly.

Real Affirmations

2010-09-14T09:44:00.002-04:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Affirmations can be said over and over and eventually seep into the subconscious mind, but saying something you don't really believe can actually cause resistance to what it is you are affirming. The best thing to do is to affirm something you can believe and feel to be true right now. You can say, "I am rich," yet not feel rich because you are paying attention to your debts, bills, perceived lack, so as you are affirming to be rich you are actually feeling more and more lack the more you say you are rich. However, if you can actually feel rich now, by appreciating what you do have, by paying attention to the essence of wealth, by knowing and acknowledging the truth that you are actually rich because you are one with what you desire and it's only a matter of time before it manifests, then what you are affirming has power; it is a statement of truth and appreciation rather than something you are using to try to convince yourself that you are rich.

So you are then able to act rich, be rich, prepare for the further manifestation of that richness because you know it's a given. The affirmations become statements of your being, statements of proactive appreciation. You are able to relax and be patient and trust that all is well. You are able to release your resistance and allow what you've been asking for to come into your life. You still deal with your day to day responsibilities, only now, you are not allowing the feelings of lack and despair enter your mind and heart. You are able to keep these emotions at bay because you know your circumstances are only temporary and you know how powerful your focus and feelings really are. You are choosing to focus on abundance, on what you do have and appreciate in your life right now, and to feel what you desire as real in your mind and in your heart. You are able to take proactive action on your desires because you know with certainty that they are manifesting in the best ways. You know that the more you focus on the essence that you desire as being your reality now, the more of that essence you will attract.

Repetition has its place in re-programming the subconscious mind, but if you want faster and longer lasting results, it's best to deal with your resistance first and uproot it so that your affirmations have the freedom to fly. Affirmations are there to "affirm" what you already know. If you use them to convince yourself, to convince others, or to fake it 'til you make it, you may find it harder to manifest what you desire because the undercurrent is one of disbelief and desperation. You do not want to feel like you lack something and need to affirm it to get it because the essence of that is lack, not abundance. You want to feel like you already have what you desire so that you feel it now and therefore attract it into your tangible experience.

Feel it out. Say what you want and see if you feel any resistance to it. If you do, figure out what belief is countering your ability to manifest what you desire and then work on changing it to be more aligned with the truth of who you really are. Then affirm that truth with your heart and feel it in the moment as your true reality. Don't worry about appearances as they can change in an instant. One day you could appear to be poor, and the next day you are rich. Appearances and circumstances can change so why not get there in your mind and in your heart first, knowing with certainty the power of your thoughts and feelings to affect your reality?

Your Own Path

2010-08-26T10:34:00.002-04:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Sometimes when you see things working out for other people you wonder about your own dreams. It's very easy to get caught up in self-pity, impatience, doubt, sometimes jealousy, and even feeling pressure (from yourself, from others) to do the same things they did so that you too can have what they have. But in all this you may not realize that maybe you don't actually want what they have specifically and you're only going after it because you think it's the thing to do, because you feel it’s supposed to be that way or that somehow they are “right” and you are “wrong.” But it’s not about that. It’s about what’s right for you. It’s about attracting what’s right for you, what’s best for you, what’s most fulfilling for you, what you love, your own version designed for you.

Your journey is exactly as it should be right now and your desires have their own timing that's perfect for you. Remember, your happiness starts within. Don't fall into peer pressure or false thinking that tells you that you need to be where everyone else is because that's where happiness resides. Your happiness resides within you and your own purpose and fulfillment. Everyone has their own path. Stay true to yourself and don't let outside circumstances lead you to do something inauthentic. Be grateful for the feedback around you because it's showing you your own consciousness and the good that's always manifesting for you as well.

Comparing ourselves to others can be a very limiting thing. First, we need to realize that everyone's path is unique, as is yours. Second, you need to appreciate your life as it is right now, knowing that it's perfect for you right now and knowing that you can co-create the essence you desire at any time. This doesn't mean not to take chances or not to take action towards your goals and dreams. It just means to stay on your own authentic path of alignment and not compare yours to another's. Third, you can use this not as pressure for yourself but as motivation to take action on your own dreams if fear has been keeping you back.

Never compare yourself to another and feel sorry for yourself if things aren't going the same way. Use it as feedback that shows you what you really do want or don't want. Really think about your reaction and if it's in response to ego comparison and possibly what others are telling you is best, or if you actually want the same things in life (your own version of course) and truly feel it’s best for you. Think of it as a good sign when people and circumstances around you mirror your own happy interests in life because that's simply showing you your own consciousness and that the essence of what you desire is also manifesting for you in the best ways, in perfect divine time and order. Be happy for others, be happy and excited for yourself too. Trust in The Universe, trust in yourself. Be inspired, take your own action, and then let go.

The Universe Knows

2010-08-11T10:41:00.003-04:00

By: Dora Nudelman

We hear a lot about being specific with our requests to The Universe. For example, instead of asking for "more money," you would be specific about the amount of money that you want. The theory goes that if you aren't specific, The Universe won't know what you mean, that you will ask for more money and could receive a penny instead of what you really wanted.

However, we cannot say that The Universe is "all knowing" and then question that it will know what we mean. The Universe responds to our feelings, our vibrational offering. When you say you want "more money" you probably know what that means to you. Most likely that means you want financial freedom, security, and the like. That is the essence to which The Universe responds, not so much your words.

The only real reason to be specific is if you yourself don't know what you want. With respect to money, a great way to determine what you want is to ask yourself how much money you want and what you want it for. Then you will get to the heart of your desire, the essence you are seeking. But at the same time, even if you have a specific amount in mind, let go of any attachment you have to it and allow for "this, or something better." Remember, you are being specific for the sake of understanding the essence you are seeking so that your vibrational offering will be clear. It's less about the specifics, and more about the essence.

Don't worry that The Universe won't know what you want. You do not need to explain yourself, clarify, justify, or convince The Universe of anything. Anything you do in this respect is solely for your own benefit, so that you get clear on the vibrational offering you are sending out.

Most of all, focus on simply aligning with your true essence, which is all good and infinitely abundant. Your authentic desires are inspired by your purpose. The Universe already knows your purpose, your desires, and what is most fulfilling for you. When you align with the truth, by releasing negative beliefs and trusting in a higher power, all else flows to you joyously. When you align with your true self, your authentic desires are known to you and are there to guide you in the direction of your purpose and total fulfillment, of which The Universe is already aware.

Do not worry about being specific. Find the essence you desire and feel that as your reality now. Align with your higher-self and let the joy flow into your life from the inside out. Be specific to clarify for yourself the essence you desire, but let go of your attachments and let The Universe do its thing.

Spiritual and Physical

2010-07-13T10:39:00.002-04:00

By: Dora Nudelman

So many of us who have become spiritually aware get over-consumed with the spiritual side of things so much so that we forget about the physical part. We somehow associate manifestation with something that's non-spiritual or too material. We can also feel guilty for wanting physical things and experiences because we've convinced ourselves that it is not noble, spiritual, or righteous to want these things.

However, spirituality does not separate itself from the physical world. After all, everything physical starts out in the spiritual realm and still maintains the same spiritual elements within its physicality. Lest we forget, we are physical beings too. Yes we're spiritual being having a physical experience, but we are having a physical experience. This part cannot be neglected. We are here in this physical world for a reason. If we allow ourselves to get lost in the clouds we will miss out on the whole point of this physical experience, which is to marry the physical with our spiritual awareness.

Physical manifestation is the completion of the spiritual. By embracing our desires and fulfilling our goals proactively and in spiritually-minded ways, we are actually bringing spirit full circle and circulating the energy as it was meant to be.

Do not ignore your physical needs. To maintain a healthy vessel is to have more room for The Light to enter and flow through you. And do not feel guilty for your physical pleasures in life as they too are gifts from The Divine. The Universe wants you to enjoy. Divine Spirit created the physical for us all. Do not allow self-righteousness to become your catalyst to martyrdom. There is nothing inherently selfish or bad in enjoying your life to its fullest. Bring your spiritual awareness and elevated consciousness to all that you do and you will fulfill your worldly goals with spirit and truth.

Know that you are deserving of your good. You deserve to feel good, have good, and you are good, right now and always. Ground yourself so that you balance out your thoughts with your actions. Bring your personal energy back into yourself. Feel the energy from the earth and feel it balancing your chakras, moving from your feet through your head and out into The Universe. Feel the Light coming from the ether in through your body and down through your chakras and into the earth. Let it be a two way street. Let yourself be a pipeline, a beautiful vessel for The Light. Be your truth, speak your truth, act your truth. If you are too airy fairy, you will be out of balance. If you are too into the material world, you will be oblivious to your spiritual power. Be harmonized with both. Bring your conscious awareness to everything you do in the physical realm and you will feel the power of your energy and the energy of The Universe with which you are one.

Does Our Degree of Success Depend on our Destiny?

2010-03-18T19:36:00.004-04:00

By: Dora Nudelman

I had a thought today about destiny and success that got me wondering about whether or not the degree of our success is based on something pre-determined. This is what I came up with:

We each have a purpose that we chose before we came into our physicality. This purpose you can call your destiny. And this purpose only involves that which you love. Your gifts and talents are also given to you in order for you to fulfill your purpose. We are each a piece of a larger puzzle. We are each a part of the whole and what we do affects the whole as well. We each have our unique piece, which is why there is no reason to compete with anyone.

We also each have our own definition of success. Our definition is either based on what we feel is soul-inspired, or by ego. An example of an ego-inspired desire is wanting to make more money than your friends so that you feel better than them and more powerful. A soul-inspired desire is wanting to be successful so that you can share your gifts with the world.

Decide what your definition of success is. Ask yourself what you define as true fulfillment. List your desires and determine what's motivating them. This way you will know which are truly soul-inspired and part of your purpose.

I believe that our authentic soul-inspired desires are our guidance system towards our purpose. Now, our purpose may very well reach beyond what we dream up for ourselves, but that's the beauty of detachment and allowance; allowing Source to direct us in the way of our purpose and our joy.

As long as you feel happiness from within, your desires will be motivated by your purpose instead of your ego. Only when you feel something is lacking do you then start craving for things external to you to make you happy. But when you act out of wholeness, you draw to yourself circumstances that complement your already happy and fulfilling life. Because you know that everything you desire in life is already yours, you don't want for anything. Your actions are simply those of a person who knows that greatness is already a part of them and manifesting for them in every moment.

So, back to the question. Is level of success determined by a pre-determined destiny? First we must examine what 'level' really means, aside from 'success.' Do we base the level on monetary amounts, number of clients, number of friends, number of dates, number of accomplishments...what does 'level' really refer to? Only you can answer that for yourself.

When you know what you mean by success then you can determine what valuation to give it. But, it you already feel happy from within, you already feel successful, and your fulfillment does not depend on external circumstances. While external events can certainty contribute to an already happy state, they cannot replace it. If you are not happy from within, no amount of 'success' will make you happy because you will always be feeling a lack and you will always look to the external world to fill it. But that can never happen in truth. Only you can fill yourself up through your consciousness and awareness of universal truths and how they work in your life.

Our destiny is to be fulfilled. Our destiny is to fulfill our piece of the puzzle - our purpose. But our destiny also involves choice and free will. We can choose to align with our purpose or to align with our doubts. We can choose to achieve through spirit or to achieve through ego. Our destiny is to be happy and to share our joy with the world. In fulfilling our purpose and living it, we are fulfilled. So, if our level of success is indeed pre-determined, it doesn't really matter because it is totally aligned with what we want for ourselves anyway (or something even better).

I believe we can be/do/have anything we desire in life, but that there is also a reason why we want what we want. We would never have chosen a purpose that we did not love. It is the very fact that we love it that we are motivated to do it. Our destiny is not to suffer, but to experience and express joy in all that we do and are. So if you find yourself doing something you deplore and your think it's your karma to do so, you may want to rethink that.

While in our journey to discover our purpose we may need to eradicate certain ego traits, this does not mean we need to do it through suffering. If you know better you can take a proactive approach and realize before the effects show up what it is you need to transform within yourself. Through introspection you can uproot negative patterns and beliefs and change them at the causal level. This will bring you back to your purpose path, which is one of joy and love.

The universe is infinite. There is no end to the positive possibilities we have available to us. But there is a reason for our specific desires and talents. We are here to express our own authenticity and see it as a contribution to the whole of which we are part. So while we can go on and on all day about destiny and free will, the bottom line of it is, whatever we will for ourselves at our core, is what we are here to do. And what we are here to do is what we love. It is through love that sharing is done best. It is through love that others will benefit from what you have to give. And it is through love that you find the internal fulfillment you've been seeking, through which all else falls easily into place.

Whether the level of your success is pre-determined or not, it is probably more than you ever imagined and it is in-line with what you want for yourself (or something even better). So there really is nothing to worry about. Your calling is your joy. And whatever 'level' of success you achieve, if done out of your soul, it will be as you desire, or even better than you desire. So stop worrying about your destiny and just live it.

How To Find Your Soulmate - Part 2

2010-03-10T16:12:00.004-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

When deciding what you want it's equally, if not more important, to know why you want it. This philosophy works in every area of your life, including with your relationships.

When searching for their soulmate, some people are motivated by ego-centered reasons. They feel insecure and incomplete, they need someone to validate their worth, they want to compete with their friends, they want someone to financially support them, they want a certain status...and the list can go on. But when you are motivated by your ego, what ends up happening is that even if you do get what you want, it may turn out not to be right for you. Or, you may end up with someone that mirrors your insecurities through their derogatory behaviour towards you.

So, it's very important that you become secure and confident in your own skin. Only then, when you feel worthy of love and whole as a person, will you attract the one who matches your positive vibration.

Once you've uncovered your motives and released your insecurities, the next step is to be proactive about meeting someone great. Now, I want to emphasize that being proactive does not mean being desperate, chasing after anyone, or doing things that compromise your integrity. What being proactive means is knowing who you are and acting out of confidence and inspiration.
People often wonder where to start in their search for a soulmate. First, don't think of it as a search because if you do, you may end up attached to outcome, desperately seeking and chasing after people and circumstances, and making bad decisions. The first thing I would tell you is release your agenda. It's good to have positive expectations in general, but don't get too attached to any one scenario.

Here are some tips for when you're choosing where to go and what to do in hopes of meeting that someone special:

1) Don't be attached to outcome. If you are, you will not only give off a desperate vibe, you may also end up disappointed. Don't just go somewhere for the sole reason of meeting someone. Make sure wherever you choose to be that you are there because you want to be there. Don't fake it. Be true to yourself.

2) Do what's authentic to you. It's not just about attracting who you want, it's about attracting who you are. Know the qualities you desire in a mate and be them in essence and consciousness. Give what you want to receive. And please, do what you love. This way, whether you meet someone or not, you still have a great time doing something that really interests you. Everything just flows a lot easier this way, when you're not trying to force anything and you're just living in the moment.

3) Don't only think of what you want to receive from a relationship, think of what you want to give as well. When you think of the positive contributions you can make in someone else's life your energy shifts from one of prowling to one of sharing. Instead of feeling like a hungry vulture looking for meat, you are now expressing your worth and value. Your attitude can change immensely from one of insecurity and a "what can you do for me" mentality, to one of "I have so much to share, anyone would be lucky to have me in their lives."

4) It's good to expect the best, just don't get attached to anything or anyone specific. Feel the essence of what you desire, and embody that essence as who you are as well. Then let it go. Let it all go. Trust that everything is working out great and that you are attracting your perfect mate right now. Deal with any skeletons you may have, and then allow yourself to be guided by the universe to the best places, people and circumstances. It's all done for you, you just have to be awake, aware and take action.

5) Whatever you choose to do and wherever you choose to go, make sure you remove your agenda for how you want things to turn out. You can certainly have positive expectations, but as mentioned earlier, let go of any attachment.

6) Be the part of a person who already has all their desires. In this case, be the part of the person who is in a loving soulmate relationship. So, when you choose what to do and where to go, you can be sure your motives are pure.

For example, you may decide that going to a boxing match might be a good place to meet a guy. You actually can't stand boxing and feel it's a violent sport you'd rather not participate in. However, your friend met her husband at a match so you think you might have the same luck.

Now, if you were already happily married, would you still go somewhere you didn't really want to go in order to meet a guy. No, you wouldn't need to. However, you might go to the museum or an art class or the gym, or anywhere else that interests you, despite the fact that you're married. Why? Because even as a happily married person you are true to your interests and are confident to express your individuality. The point here is that by acting and thinking and feeling from the position of your desires having already manifested, you are being more authentic to who you are and what you truly love to do. Your motives are not to go on the prowl to places you don't like in hopes of snagging a guy. Your motives are now to follow your bliss and let the universe handle the rest.

How To Find Your Soulmate - Part 1

2010-03-10T12:18:00.006-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

I know there are many people out there searching for their soulmate; someone to share their lives with, their joys, their experiences...but how do you deal with disappointment and frustration from not having met that person yet?

The key is to remain patient, yet not allowing patience to become a pseudonym for denial. If you are truly relaxed and patient, knowing with certainty that all will work out for the best, then great, stay patient. But if you have internal blockages or resistance that you are not dealing with (like insecurity, fear, doubt), then patience may actually be a mask for denial (where you are not dealing with core issues that are keeping your mate from you). In this case, you will need to release your blockages in order to really attract the best person for you.

So what are some of these blockages and how do you resolve them?

Ok, so when looking for a soulmate, don't be obsessed with finding someone "perfect." Realize that what you really want is someone perfect for you. We are all here for a reason; we all have a journey as well as some resistance we may need to release, so judging others for their imperfections is really like judging ourselves.

Figure out what qualities are most important to you, and then be the person you want to attract. For example, if you want someone who is kind, be kind. If you want someone who is generous, be generous. And so on.

Know that together, you will learn and grow with each other. You both have something to teach and something to learn. Be forgiving of yourself and others, but be respectful too. Respect and love yourself and you will have more love and respect to share.

Try to refrain from making assumptions that are based in your own fears and insecurities, and even past experiences. Have compassion but also maintain healthy boundaries.

Look for the positive qualities in people, and know that they are inherently good. Any other qualities are a result of insecurities and fears. Look deeper into a person's soul. Be proactive in your communication. Be honest and follow your integrity and authenticity.

Aim to be with someone you feel good being around, despite any disagreements you may have. Look at the bigger picture. Know that while people may disagree, it's about your communication skills with each other and how you deal with your differences of opinion. Everyone resonates to their own vibe and have certain people that resonate with them more than others as a partner. Find someone who resonates with your vibe and you with theirs.

As long as you are both being authentic and true to yourselves, you can feel comfortable expressing yourselves with each other. Don't get into a relationship with the expectation that you will change the other person. Accept them for who they truly are right now. Fall in love with them now versus their potential or what you hope you can turn them into. Of course potential can be attractive and can be a considering factor, but don't forget about the person they are right now too. Just like you wouldn't like to have someone try to change you or have to play a role, don't expect others to do so either. Get to know who they are and love them for who they are. Ask yourself if these qualities are something that you can accept now.

What are your deal-breakers? Figure these out from your soul not from your ego. You may disagree with each other, you may even bicker at times, but at the end of the day if you feel fulfilled in your relationship, then you're doing well.

Look at your personality. What are your strengths? What are some ego traits that would serve you to transform? For example, a person can be super sensitive, this sensitivity can be a strength and it can also indicate an area that needs some work. A good match could be someone who appreciates your sensitivity while also proactively and lovingly challenging you to find more inner strength and confidence.

To recap, perfection is in the eye of the beholder. Consider what traits you admire in a mate, and be the essence of what you desire. Know what your boundaries and deal-breakers are in advance, but also know your reasons behind them. Be flexible and non-judgmental. And let go of your attachment to outcome. Be happy in your own skin. Know you are already whole and complete on your own. Be motivated not by insecurity or lack, but by knowing that you have so much to share. Know that your wholeness meeting up with your mate's wholeness, brings a sense of expansion and expression, which you can share with the world.

Acceptance and Surrender Does NOT Mean Defeat

2010-03-07T21:20:00.003-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Acceptance of, and surrender to, what is, is an important element of proactive positive manifestation. Some people might think that if they accept their current situation that this means they've given up. But this couldn't be farther from the truth.

Think of it this way, when you are constantly dwelling on what you don't like about your life, complaining about it, feeling sorry for yourself, blaming others and worrying over it night and day, you are creating more of the same. You cannot get to a better place with the same mind-set that got you to where you are right now. Worrying, fighting, resenting and the like will not get you the results you seek. It will only make things worse.

The fact is, when you dwell and focus on what you don't like, you are creating resistance. And simply put, what you resist persists. So how do you get to a place of feeling better? It's simple really. Just accept where you are in life right now. This doesn't mean you have to like it or that you're settling for it, it just means you've accepted it for what it is in the moment. This doesn't make you a bad person or a failure. It does makes you aware and empowered. To surrender to something that's bigger than yourself and give up the need to control every detail of everything, allows for a huge weight to get lifted from your shoulders.

When you accept something, you no longer resist or fight against it. Anything you fight against actually creates more of the same. Why? Because when you're fighting against something, you're focused on the negative aspect of it. And when you're focused on what's "wrong" you cannot be focused on what's "right." But to change your circumstances you need to change your focus onto what's "right." S0, when you offer acceptance to what is, you stop fighting against it and instead you choose to focus on what you want versus what you don't. As you do this, your circumstances will come up to meet your vision of yourself. Believe it and you'll see it.

So if you're ever feeling down on yourself, here are some steps that can help you shift focus and create what you desire in your life:

1) Whatever your situation is right now, accept it from a neutral place. Recognize that it has some meaning and purpose in your life right now. Tell yourself, "it is what it is." What you'll probably end up feeling is relief. Refrain from judging yourself. Forgive yourself and know that you can choose a different path if you want to.

2) Let it go. Allow the universe, G-d, Source or whatever you call this grand energy, to take over from the standpoint of guiding you into the direction you need to go. Don't over-analyze or try to force anything. Everything will come into place in divine time.

3) Take responsibility for your life and everything in it. This DOES NOT mean self-blame. It simply means that since you've created this circumstance, you are equally capable of changing it to something you do want. You can choose your thoughts, your feelings and your actions. You are in control of them, not the other way around.

4) Now visualize the outcome you desire and feel it as your reality right now. What does that feel like to you? Get into it. Know with certainty that this is your new reality and that it's manifesting at this very moment. Feel good about it, let it go (patience) and do things that uplift your spirits. Watch a funny movie, hang out with good friends, have a nice meal, listen to your favorite music - whatever it is, do something that feeds your soul. Volunteering or helping someone out is often also a great way to get outside of your personal situation. It makes you feel good and it helps someone all at the same time.

5) Know that whatever 'negativity' you are experiencing is only temporary. As you reach for genuinely good feelings (versus repression and faking it), you will change your point of focus and the momentum of your attraction. You will start to attract things, people, circumstances that are on the vibrational level of your new focus and feelings.

6) Instead of masking your problems, get to the root of them. Find out what your subconscious beliefs are. Reaching for good feelings is great, but if you don't get your beliefs in check, you may wobble back and forth between feeling good and not feeling good. So, how do you do this? Well, you don't want to dwell on every unpleasant past experience you've had, or psycho-analyze yourself too much. This would be counter-productive.

What you can do is think of your desires and feel them out. When you think of them, how do you feel? Hopeful? Fearful? Doubtful? Confident? If it doesn't feel good or it doesn't feel believable to you then you know there is a blockage there that needs to be addressed. You can pretend to feel good about it, but the universe responds to your true feelings. You will get much better results if you're just honest with yourself. So, if you do feel resistance to your desire, ask yourself what you truly believe about it. Then when you find the faulty belief, question it. Don't take it at face value. You've created this belief and now you can change it. Forget all your "past evidence" as this will only keep you stuck. Start today with a fresh slate. Pretend like you've always been successful. Create affirmations that help you express what you know to be true. You can simply start with, "I release my old negative beliefs and patterns and I now choose to believe..."

7) Be grateful. You cannot appreciate and depreciate at the same time. There are plenty of reasons to be proactively thankful in life. If you look for them, you will find them. Just like you can see the glass as half empty, you can also choose to see it as half full (or full is even better). When you are in a state of appreciation, your momentum shifts as well. Be grateful for even what you may consider to be the smallest of things. Recognize that you may be taking for granted the same things that others consider a luxury. Count your blessings and guaranteed you will have more to count.

Bottom line is, when you accept what is, let it go and surrender to a higher power, and then change your focus, you are empowering yourself. This is the very opposite of giving up. When you no longer offer resistance, you are now in allowing mode. This means that what you've asked for now has easy access to you. You've opened the door. So do yourself a favor, get yourself out of victim consciousness and start moving into the life you desire, because you have it in you!

Overcoming Depression and Finding Happiness

2010-03-01T09:16:00.005-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman.

I wanted to write today on the topic of finding happiness in response to those people who are experiencing frustration, stress and even depression. While I certainly do not intend to make light of depression, I want to address a possible solution that may help people who are experiencing it, in any degree. This is not intended to be medical advice, but rather some points that may help bring perspective.

When feeling frustrated, sad or depressed, one can feel very isolated and alone, even if you have tons of people around you. The first thing to remember is that you are never truly alone. You are made up of the same energy that makes up everyone and everything. You are one with the universe. There is a higher energy of which we are all a part that is with us, and within us, at all times. It is there offering support, guidance and love, always. All you need to do is open yourself up to it through your awareness of it.

If you are feeling depressed, it can help to talk about or even write about the reasons why. Bottling it up and re-living it over and over in the mind only takes you deeper into your frustration and sadness. A journal could be a good place to start. The purpose of this exercise is to simply recognize the root cause of your depression. Then you can go one by one and deal with each one at its root. Our perceptions are just that, they are our own perceptions. The negativity we feel is something we choose through our thoughts and through our acceptance of others' thoughts and actions towards us. Many of the negative things we perceive are often fabrications of our ego mind. They aren't actually based in truths; they are imagined and embellished. This is not to say they don't feel real, obviously they do, otherwise there would be no such thing as depression at all. The point to remember is that we have total control over our own thoughts, feelings and beliefs.

This brings me to my next point. The mind is so powerful. We have the ability to choose our thoughts, which then create how we feel, which then affect our actions, which then create our world. The root is within us. As such, we can choose to use this power to work for us or to work against us. It is our choice. We choose what we believe in. You can choose to believe the world is a bad place or you can choose to believe in people and circumstances as friendly, loving and as having a purpose. In either case, what you believe is what creates your experience in life. Again, this is your choice.

Blaming others and feeling like a victim is a sure way to get deeper into a depressed state. Why? Because when you do this, you give away your power to others. Of course you will feel helpless this way, because you've given others the authority to determine how you feel. Take your power back. Take responsibility for your own thoughts. When you do, you will realize that you do not need the approval of others to be yourself. You do not need to take on others' beliefs if you don't want to. And no one has the power to affect you negatively unless you allow them to do so. This is what it means to be empowered.

Appreciation is a very powerful tool. Use it to recognize all the blessings you have right now. The very fact that you are alive and reading this blog, for example, means there is a purpose for it. There is a great and important reason why you are here right now on this earth. We each have a unique purpose to serve, and the fact that we're given this opportunity to do so is something to appreciate greatly.

Finding and living your purpose is something that gets you out of thinking only about yourself. The "poor me" syndrome only gets you deeper into a depressed state. Again, it's about getting out of the victim mode and into an empowered mode. When you realize you have a unique purpose, you suddenly have a mission in life. Starting to explore what you love and what brings you joy as you express it, is a great way to gain a new and fun perspective on life. You can do/be/have the essence of anything you desire in life. You just need to be open to it and believe in it and in you.

Focus on what you love rather than what you don't like. If you spend too much time focusing on everything that's "wrong" in your life, that is a sure way to get more depressed about life. When you focus on everything that's right, your energy shifts, as does your momentum. This isn't a race so go at your own pace, but start with something that feels good to you. Watch a funny movie, read a good uplifting book, and even just looking at nature and the perfection of it all is something that can create great wonder. You start to realize and acknowledge this great power that's orchestrating everything perfectly, in nature, and for you.

You are perfect. There is nothing inherently bad or wrong about you. You may have some errors in thinking, but this is fixable. Embrace your uniqueness and be proud of it. You were made in G-d's image (or the universe, source, or whatever you want to call it) and G-d is perfection. You are how you are for a great reason. If everyone was exactly the same this would be a very boring place to be. If you're eccentric, great, be eccentric. If you are creative, then great, be creative. If you have a dream, then go for it. There is a reason for all of it. Don't let anyone determine your worth based on their opinions. People will have opinions of you, and that's fine. You'll have opinions of others. The key is to live your life based on your own integrity and to allow others the same privilege. Refrain from judging others and others will follow suit. You are not here to live others' lives. You are here to live your own. From there you will have something much more meaningful to give to the world. Don't be embarrassed by your differences, embrace them and work with them. Know you are who you are for a reason. Be true to yourself. Know that you are good. Know that you are more than good enough.

Finding happiness is actually quite easy if you know where to look. Happiness is within and it's a choice. People too often look outside of themselves to find it, and because of that they sometimes never do. It's like the dangling carrot that you chase but is always out of reach, or like a dog chasing it's own tail. Happiness is within you, not outside of you. When you choose to be happy, to appreciate, to give and receive love, you feel happy. This then spills over into every area of your life because you are now on a new vibration.

Vibration simply refers to your feelings and how they attract to you. The more positive a feeling, the higher the vibration and the more positive results you get. The more negative a feeling, the lower the vibration and the worse off you feel and attract. There is a momentum that builds based on the level of your thoughts and feelings. The thing is though, no matter what point you are in life and no matter how you feel now, you can shift your momentum at any time. Just be consistent and determined to do so. Choose your focus and your energy will shift as well.

And just so you know, there is no such thing as negative energy. Energy is always positive. The feelings of sadness, frustration, anger and depression are really a lack of energy. They are draining you of energy. It's like a black hole that just sucks everything into it. These emotions are bread of the ego, and as mentioned above, are up to you to choose or deny. It might sound harsh and it may seem impossible, but the more you accept this truth, the more empowered you'll be to change things around. Sure, it can feel very difficult to accomplish this shift in mentality at first, but all you need to start with is a desire to change. As you gain momentum, it will get easier to maintain. Take baby steps, one by one, and notice how your momentum grows.

Negativity is man-made, and since man made it, man can eliminate it as well. The only power in the universe is positivity. That's it. We are connected to it. We are one with it. We only need to acknowledge it to activate it within our lives.

Read, write, learn, attend classes, seminars, do whatever you need to do in this light to grow your knowledge of the universal truths and surround yourself with positivity. Research is a great tool, especially made easy by the Internet these days. Some key words and phrases that can help are: life on purpose, finding your purpose, Bach flower remedies (flower essences that help with mood and that are all natural), etc. There are lots of support systems out there, you just need to be open to them. Homeopathy and acupuncture are great helps. Joining a fun group that shares your interests can also be a great way to get uplifted. Be resourceful, be open and you will find your answers.

If you want the answer to something, just ask and you will be guided to it. You have all that you need already within you. You have the power to change your life. The question is, what are you going to do about it?

Here's a check list of things you can do that can help you shift your energy:

Question your negative thoughts. Don't take them at face value or assume they're true.
Think about something bigger than yourself. There is a great energy that you are a part of that is guiding you and helping you.
Do something to help others. When you do this, you get outside of your own problems and you end up gaining perspective through the joy you bring to others.
Think about all your gifts. You are blessed, you sometimes just need to remind yourself.
Appreciate, appreciate, appreciate. You cannot be depressed and appreciative at the same time.
Realize you have a purpose. Find it, live it, enjoy it.
Know you are here for a super important reason that only you can achieve in your unique way.
Ask questions.
Don't bury yourself in your worries and doubts. Talk to someone about your feelings. There is no shame in that. Write it out.
Surround yourself with positivity. Read an inspirational book, watch a funny movie, take a walk in nature, etc.
Join a supportive group.
Know you are never really alone and that you are connected and one with all.
Know that as your perceptions change, so will what you put out into the world, and what comes back to you.
Know that you are good at your core.
Learn to forgive yourself and others.
Explore your spiritual nature. Move beyond exteriors and appearances to know that there is something beneath the surface worth exploring.
Ask for guidance. Meditate on it. Let it go and it will come.
Have fun. Be child-like. Lighten-up. Life is meant to be fun. You don't need to struggle.
Negativity is man-made. Light dissolves all darkness.
Let go of your need to control everything. If things don't "go your way" know that there is a better way. Just have faith and be patient. Infinite patience produces immediate results.
Hold positive thoughts in your mind. Use focus shifting words like, happy, healthy, wealthy, joyous, and the like. It sounds simple, but it's very powerful.
Don't over-complicate. Things are really simpler than they seem.

Feeling Overwhelmed and Stressed Out?

2010-02-25T19:26:00.005-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

I find myself feeling a bit overwhelmed today just thinking about all the stuff I need to do. I have a plan of action regarding my career aspirations, and thinking about all the steps is causing me to feel a bit stressed. Actually, I'm causing myself to be stressed. After all, we're the ones that react to life in the way that we choose, right?

So this is me following my own advice. In light of that, I thought I would share my process with you, in case you're feeling overwhelmed too, or at least have in the past. This is what I intend to do:

1) Enjoy the process. Life isn't just a series of to do's or tasks to finish. Sure there are steps we sometimes need to take to get things done, but who said we need to rush through them? Who said it needs to feel like torture? Having fun with the process gets us out of a rushing mode. We suddenly start having fun with what we're doing rather than letting it become a chore. Life is about the journey just as much as the destination, and wouldn't it be better to get to where we want to go feeling that it was so much fun getting there? It's like the difference between flying first class for a few hours, versus walking barefoot through a dry heated desert for weeks trying to get to the same destination. You'll get there eventually, but why not do it in style?

2) Delegate. This one has been a challenge for me because I've always liked to do things 'my way.' Yes, sometimes you're the only one who can do it a certain way, but it's a matter of compromise and priorities. What's really important for you to do yourself? Be honest. Things only you can do, like write a book in your own words, for example, do them. But, those things you can delegate, delegate them. It's OK if they're done a bit differently, as long as they get done. And by delegating, you give someone else an opportunity to do what they're good at too. For those control freaks out there who want everything done in a specific way, or for those people who just want to prove to themselves and everyone else that they can do everything, a word of advice: even if you can do everything, do you really need to? Maybe you could spend more time honing your talents, doing what you actually love to do, or doing what you do best? There's a difference between a healthy challenge and beating yourself tired trying to control every detail in your life. Learn to let go a little. Baby steps are good to start.

3) Take things one step at a time. While it's good to have an action plan, don't let it drive you crazy. Planning all the steps ahead of time and pressuring yourself to get things done will not get them done any faster. Actually, you'll probably end up exhausting yourself and depleting your energy store by stressing yourself out. Plus, while it's nice to have a plan, it's also important to take things one step at a time, not worrying how it's all going to get done, and being flexible to possible changes. Start with the first thing on your list and work on that. Often some of the other tasks on your list will depend on the one before it getting done, so there's no sense of worrying about it now. You'll cross that bridge when you come to it. You'll know what to do, don't worry. Just follow the guidance you are given. And you are given guidance. You just need to relax into the flow of life in order to be aware of it. If you're busy pressuring yourself, you'll be too preoccupied to recognize the guidance you're given.

4) Release the pressure. Don't give yourself additional stress by placing unnecessary pressure on yourself. All you can do is do your best. Working all day and all night is actually counterproductive. All you'll accomplish is being exhausted. And your work won't be as good anyway. After about 90 minutes of straight work, your efficiency levels drop. Taking breaks is very important to having a fresh and clear mind. You'll actually accomplish more by taking time out to relax. Make sure you are leading a balanced lifestyle, meaning, take care of yourself, take care of your relationships, take care of your body, mind and spirit too. It's about having harmony in all areas of your life. What good will it do to have accomplished your goals but have no energy to enjoy it? Don't take your health, your relationships, or anything else for granted. Your work will still be there, but maybe you'll find a better more efficient way of handling it once you have time to get some perspective.

And this taking the pressure off also relates to all of your desires in life. Don't think that the harder you push,the more you struggle, and the more impatient you are, the faster it will all manifest. The opposite is actually true. But the more at ease and trusting you are, the better it will all be. Pushing harder or trying to force things to happen sooner than they need to will only stress you out and cause delay in what you want to manifest. Take it easy; Light and easy. Have fun, relax and it will all manifest in the best way. Remember, this goes for all your desires - relationships, career goals, financial goals, and any other life goals. Let go and it will flow.

5) Be patient. Don't be impatient with yourself. Feeling impatient or feeling guilty is a self-sabotaging emotion. If you owe someone money, for example, and you're relying on making enough money to pay them back, being impatient and feeling guilty while working yourself sick will not help the situation. Be thankful for your opportunities, be thankful for any help you receive, and move at your own soul-driven pace. As long as you are moving in the right direction (i.e. guided and proactive), everything will work out well. And those people who are helping you out, well, let them. They offered it for a reason and they're probably not putting as much pressure on you as you are. Receiving graciously is also an important quality to exhibit. (Be a good giver and a good receiver.) And even if you don't have help and you've got creditors waiting for their payday, as long as you have genuine intentions and a knowing that you will succeed, you will pay them off much faster and in a way much more enjoyable than if you're stressed over it. And if you need help, don't be ashamed to ask for it. When you take down your pride, you'd be amazed at all the opportunities that show up.

6) Have respect for the body, mind and spirit and all areas of life. Remember, if you burn out you not only won't get things done any faster, you also won't be able to do much for anyone else either. Taking care of your health and making sure you eat right, exercise, spend time in nature, meditate, socialize, nurture yourself, appreciate, surround yourself with positivity (even if that's mentally making sure your thought are positive), and whatever else you love to do, will ensure a much more joyous journey and a lot more fun and efficiency than if you work yourself tired or sick.

7) Release negative emotions. Know that negative emotions are draining and will only hinder and delay your success. Thinking that worrying or stressing is going to help you get things done faster is ridiculous. Worrying about something will never make it better. So relax, know that you are at the right place at the right time, right now and do your best to maintain a healthy balance. Let it be easy. If you know better, which I think you do, you don't have to work hard. Work smart instead. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it. Don't be afraid to delegate if you need to. And maintain a positive, confident, calm and upbeat attitude. Appreciate, appreciate, appreciate. Notice the opportunities right in front of you. Learn and grow. And remember, it will be as easy or as hard as you believe it will be. It's all your choice as you choose your reactions in life. So choose wisely.

8) Make decisions based on your integrity, authenticity and positivity. Think briefly how much of the stress you're experiencing comes from your worry and negative pre-judgments? Think about how you would feel if you no longer had those worries and fears. For instance, say money is a sore subject for you and you feel you just don't have enough, how would you feel if money were no longer an issue for you? How would it feel to be wealthy? Would you treat your job, your projects, your family any differently? Would you treat life like a pressure cooker, or as a fun adventure? Would you be doing what you love?

Once you've identified how you would feel, get into that feeling now. Find the essence of that feeling in your life right now too. What can you do now to feel this essence of joy and freedom? Could you take some time each day to do something fun? Could you appreciate and recognize all the wealth you actually already have now? Could you recognize the abundance in the universe available to you right now (just look in nature and you'll see what I mean)? Look around you, be appreciative for all the things you've taken for granted in your search for more, and the universe will respond with more blessings. Why? Because that's where your focus is, and as we know, what you focus on expands. Thinking about how you would feel and feeling it now, visualizing it, and then recognizing that essence in your life right now with appreciation, are all excellent steps to achieving your dreams, but in a relaxed and meaningful way.

9) Live in the present moment. Whatever you are doing, thinking and feeling, it's all happening in the now. Even when we worry about the future or regretfully remember the past, we're still doing it in the now. Being present means being conscious of what you are creating in your life. If you want something to change, you've got to change the way you approach things. Think good thoughts, release resistance and feel good now and this will positively affect your future and your present too. You are always emitting a vibration, and you choose what frequency you're on based on what's going on inside. So be aware of how you're feeling now as this will determine what you attract into your life. The stronger the vibration, the more the momentum grows so grow it in the right direction.

Going with the Flow & Embracing the Unknown

2010-02-22T09:20:00.002-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Often we want to know the reason behind everything that comes into our lives, right away. It's like we want to find out as fast as we possibly can so as not to waste any time, or so that we can avoid making any 'mistakes.' We seek this idealized version of perfection and we make choices out of fear. We think if we avoid life and making 'mistakes,' then we'll be secure and we'll get to the end safely. But life isn't just about being done. It's not about getting to the end. It's about living life to the fullest while we're here and with the most joy.

All of our experiences, whether we perceive them as good or bad, are all opportunities to live an authentic life. Each experience we have gives us more knowledge, even if it's knowing what we don't want so that we can focus on what we do want. As we grow our knowledge of how the universe works, we find the perfection that has been within us all along. We recognize that life is perfect right now. We are exactly where we need to be right now. We are perfect right now. Life is less about trying to attain perfection, and more about remembering that we already are perfection. The more you are aware of this, the more you'll find this spilling over into your life experiences as well.

Life is not meant to be one long checklist. Sure there are things we want to get done. But it's equally important to enjoy each moment on the way to getting things done. And once we've accomplished what we set out to do, we can enjoy that too. Then we can keep moving forward and continuing our expansion and growth. It's about being inspired and happy the whole way through. The more we realize this, the more fun we'll have, the more inspired we'll be and the more we'll have to share with the world.

When we recognize that not everything is always revealed right away (and that there is a reason for that as well), we can relax and go with the flow and just make the best, most authentic decisions we know of in the moment, moment by moment. Knowing that everything is being taken care of, even if you don't know how, allows you to focus on what you love, without the burden of stress and anxiety. Of course it's important to take action in your life, but when you let go to guidance, your action becomes inspired and fun. You'll know what to do, and you won't have to struggle to get there. It's not a competition and it's not a race. Move at the pace that moves you. We each have a purpose and we each have our unique attributes. Don't let someone else's pace determine yours. When you let go to being guided, you are guided to the pace that's right for you at any given moment. This is what it means to be authentic.

The ego wants to fill in all the gaps of the unknown, even if it's with fictional information. But once we get comfortable with not having to know everything in advance, we eliminate the fear that goes along with the unknown and we become open to being guided step by step. We can choose to embrace the faith, trust and peace that comes with knowing that there is an all-loving, all-knowing energy that is with us and within us at all times. When you give up the need to control every detail of your life, you can finally be at peace. Knowing that there is an all-powerful energy always on your side, looking out for you and synchronizing everything for you perfectly to the degree that you allow yourself to receive this wonderful guidance, you can feel free and simply relax into the flow of life rather than trying to control it, force it or struggle through it. That is the true meaning of empowerment.

We determine how much we struggle based in large part on our choices in life and how accepting we are of divine guidance. When we lead with the ego, we find the path of life harder than it needs to be. But when we detach from outcome and let go to divine flow, we are led in the perfect way with ease and joy. You can spend your life enjoying yourself with a child-like exuberance, or you can push, pull, force and manipulate your way causing yourself and others much strife and unhappiness. Sure you may get to where you want to go this way, but how fun will it be getting there? How fun will it be when you arrive? Happiness goes beyond the destination. It's something you feel from within and it's something that colors your experiences, your entire journey and the destinations to which you arrive. What we all want is to be happy, and this happiness is something we can choose. We choose it by seeing the positive in everything, by being appreciative and by being forgiving (with ourselves and others). We choose it by letting go. We choose it by spreading love. We choose it by following our passions and purpose without fear or regret. Once we choose the happy path, we feel a sense of ease, guidance, joy and fun in all that we do. We then share this joy with others. We feel free to follow our passions, knowing that everyone benefits from our joy.

And by choosing to swim with the current, you eliminate struggle and force. Swimming with the current simply means allowing yourself to be guided in the flow. It gives you and opportunity to be your authentic unique self with joy and ease. It removes your need for approval because you are going at your own personal pace in life that's right for you. You can respect your path and the paths of others, using others as inspiration rather than comparing yourself to them.

By following our own flow of life, we are also able to consider the possible effects of our choices simply by taking a moment, no matter how brief, to think about our feelings and motives before we take action. Of course we can still be spontaneous in life without having to over-analyze every thought. However, the difference between being spontaneous and being impulsive is that in the case of spontaneity, you trust the universe implicitly and going with the flow of life using your intuition. When you are impulsive, however, you are allowing your ego to make decisions for you based on insecurity, defensiveness, fear, and the like. Knee-jerk reactions are made of the ego because they are robotic and reactive rather than empowered. Use your free will to make conscious choices that consider the after-effects. When we're hot-headed we often regret our reactions after the fact because they came of ego rather than spirit. Even the act of pausing for a second before acting can get us into the habit of being conscious of our actions. Knowing that the energy you put out into the world is what you get back, it certainly gives you enough incentive to think before you speak and act.

So going with the flow of life really means this: to start, releasing your need to control and know everything in advance, trusting a higher source with which you are one, and making inspired choices based on spirit, intuition and authenticity.

Understanding the Nature of Affirmations and How They Work (and why they may not)

2010-02-17T11:23:00.008-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

I recently did an online radio interview on VoiceAmerica (you can listen through the link on the right). In that interview, one point I made was that affirmations only work if you believe them. I wanted to clarify further what I meant.

When I said on the interview that if you don't believe what you are affirming that it won't work for you, what I meant was this:

Sure if you repeat a pattern enough times you can form a new habit, so if you repeat an affirmation enough times, maybe you'll start to believe it. But a more efficient way is to figure out where, why and what the resistance is and uproot the negative belief that's causing it. As Alan Cohen says in his book 'Relax Into Wealth' (one of my favorite books by the way), an affirmation is not there to try to convince you of something as being true. It's there to remind you of what already is true. So the less resistance you feel, the more aligned you are with the truth of what you are affirming.

The affirmation will work the strongest when you believe what you are saying to be true. Sometimes you can say it over and over and one day you'll start to believe it. But the point here is that only when you start to believe it will it really work for you. If you say an affirmation over and over but feel internal resistance, then stop saying it. Find something that does resonate with you and that does not create conflict within you. If your motive is to repeat an affirmation until it resonates with you, sure that could work, eventually. But if you want more effective results, really be honest about your beliefs and true feelings and work those out so that what you affirm, you actually feel as well.

So essentially it's about feeling and knowing. It's not so much what you say, but how you feel about what you say. If you are telling yourself something but your subconscious doesn't believe it, you may feel resistance towards what you are saying, and saying it 100 times over and over may not get you where you want to be. That's why I feel it's important to believe in what you are saying so that your feelings, thoughts and actions are all a match to what you are affirming. If there is any misalignment in this way, it can impede on your desires manifesting.

But there are stages of affirmations you can go through that match your level of belief at any given moment. For example, if a person who is in debt starts saying they are wealthy, subconsciously and even consciously they might not believe it. So they may keep saying it over and over in hopes of convincing themselves, but the more they say it, the less they believe it because they are paying more attention to their outer circumstances than their dialogue. As a result, they end up building up resistance to what they are saying, and as a result, the feeling they're having is one of frustration and lack rather than one of abundance.

Now, if they start with a belief like: "It is possible for me to be financially stable," then they are starting at a place that their subconscious may more likely believe. Something like, "I am becoming wealthier every day," can also start someone off right because there is no real conflict between the conscious and subconscious mind.

However, if someone in this position of debt for instance, can get themselves to feel wealthy, then saying, "I am wealthy," becomes believable for them. This works for those who are able to appreciate what they do have and focus on that. It's about perspective. So many people think they're lacking, when really they have so much that they take for granted. They could be appreciating what they have that many people in more impoverished nations, for example, would consider a luxury, like clean running water for example. You can always find something to appreciate and feel wealthy about. As such, if you feel wealthy in this way, saying you are wealthy is simply stating a truth you already know. And the more you think this way, the more your feelings and actions will reflect this truth, and the more you will realize this truth in your external experiences and circumstances as well.

So basically, an affirmation works best when you are aligned with it, mentally, emotionally and in your actions. Like I mentioned in the interview, the universe responds to feelings. Law of attraction responds to feelings (your vibrations). You cannot fake your way through it. It has to be something that you feel, believe and that resonates with you. Change your perspective so that you start to believe what you are saying. Then your affirmations will have a lot more power.

If you're interested in more of an explanation of this topic, I go into it a bit more in depth in my e-book, "The Purpose Book" coming out soon.

Overcoming Fear

2010-02-16T09:28:00.003-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Fear is one emotion that keeps many people stuck in mediocrity. There are many methods of overcoming fear, but one that I think works particularly well is this:

Say you have a presentation to give at work. You're addressing the whole company and it's a great opportunity for you to share your expertise and opinions. You prepare, but as the date approaches you get increasingly nervous. You start to wonder if you're really cut out for this. Maybe you don't even want to do it? You volunteered so on some level you must have wanted it, but now you're having second thoughts.

On the morning of your presentation day, you feel nauseous. You are going through your mind, trying to find excuses that are justifiable for backing out. You really think at this point that this type of task is not something you're made for and that you were possibly wrong in your intentions and desires.

Then you realize a couple of things, and here is where the fear starts to take a back seat. One, if you back out now, you're leaving a lot of people high and dry. What are they going to do to fill in for you at the last minute? If it was a legitimate thing, you're sure they would figure something out, but you know that it's only your fear that's freaking you out here. You want to be accountable and follow through on your word.

Two, are you really going to allow fear to rule your life? How much will you regret your decision if you do? How will you truly know if you are cut out for this task, and even if it's something you love to do, if you don't try it out first? In order to be true to yourself, you need to put the fear aside.

Three, all those people are coming to see you and hear what you have to say. What if there is someone (or more) who needs to hear what you have to say today, and because they do, it changes their life. Now think of how it would be if you allowed fear to motivate you to back out. You could be depriving someone of an important message. So you muster enough courage, for the sake of others, to follow through. Often when we take ourselves out of the equation in this way, we find the courage to go through with our tasks in life. There is a bigger picture here, and we are blessed with opportunities for a reason too.

And fourth, before your presentation you meditate and project a positive outcome. You intend your experience to be fun and received well. Then you intend to be a channel for universal energy to work through you and deliver all the right words, specifically tailored for your audience today. You take a deep breath and then you go for it and don't look back.

Imagine how good you will feel once you've completed your task. Chances are you would have enjoyed the process too. When you conquer your fears you feel empowered. And that's when you realize what a mistake it would have been to fall victim to your fear.

Avoiding Pre-judgements and Self-sabotage

2010-01-31T10:31:00.005-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Some of us have trouble letting go. Some of us feel the need to try to control every detail of life. And some of us understand the importance of detachment, but still tend to fall into the trap of making up false notions.

From personal experience, I can tell you that while I do my best to let go and just go with the flow of life, I too sometimes have fallen into the trap of making pre-judgments and coming to hypothesized conclusions that really have little to no merit. I've realized that this is just a defense mechanism for dealing with fear. When we fear disappointment, we tend to create these false scenarios based on this fear. For some reason we think that if we prepare ourselves for the worst that somehow we will be less disappointed in the long run. But it never works out that way. How many of you avoided disappointment this way? I mean, as much as we try to protect ourselves, deep down inside we still want things to work out well.

As a side note, there is a big difference between pre-judging and following your intuition. It's vitally important to recognize the difference. The way to do this is to simply ask yourself where these feelings are coming from? If you are honest with yourself, you will be able to determine whether your feeling is coming out of fear and pre-judgment, or out of intuition. Personally, the more I have been letting go of my pre-judgments, the more my intuition has kicked in to help me make decisions. When the ego is in the way, it's hard to hear your soul talking to you. But when you learn to release attachments, this is when your intuition sky-rockets, and you will not longer doubt it or question it. It will not be an assumption, but rather an intuitive hunch. And you will know the difference because you will no longer be attached to a specific outcome.

But if you have determined that you are judging out of ego, why not think of the best outcome instead? Or even simply don't make any judgements at all. Just be. Know your intention, feel how good it feels, trust it, and let it go. Then just be inspired, take action and allow yourself to be guided joyously through life. Everything will flow that much easier. Treat it as an adventure. Even if you don't know the exact outcome, know that it will be good and just take it one step at a time.

Often when something we perceive as good happens, we are on a high for a while. We have positive expectations, we are grateful, we are enthused...but then sometimes the ego kicks in. This causes doubt, fear and insecurities to show up. As a result, we start to imagine everything that can go wrong. Why it's not right. Things we don't like. What we worry will happen, etc. The excitement has worn off and now the ego has us in fear mode. In this fear mode we talk ourselves out of being happy and talk ourselves into doubt and misery. All this time, it's our doing. We are the only ones perceiving through our own eyes and consciousness. We are the ones thinking our own thoughts. And as a result, we are the only ones to blame for our own unhappiness.

All of this, I believe, is very valuable information because if you do consistently tend to pre-judge, you will also tend to act on those pre-judgments. Your mind will be made up and you will most likely attract the essence of those false judgements. It's like a self-fulfilling prophecy. This is what can happen if you try to figure everything out and control every detail. We don't always know the big picture, so when we imagine or focus on things we don't like or are afraid of, that is what we tend to feel more of in our experience. Since our imaginations are so powerful, it's crazy not to use them to our advantage.

So, try to refrain from making judgements, about things, people, circumstances. Know that there is a bigger picture here. Expect all to work out for the best, and it will.

Taking the Fear Out of Taking Action

2010-01-15T09:56:00.003-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Have you ever been afraid of taking action? I know I have. I have had several experiences in my life where I had procrastinated under the guise of trying to be properly prepared. What I had realized is that while it's important to be prepared (as the saying goes, "luck is just when preparation meets opportunity"), it is equally important to take action at some point.

I was afraid of making mistakes. But in my worry over making mistakes, I wasn't doing anything at all. Of course we all want to get it "right" the first time around, and this is very well possible if you listen to your intuition. However, being afraid of making mistakes, or not being received well, or being humiliated...it's all ego. It's all false and in your head.

What I have learned is to focus not so much on how my actions will affect me, but what benefit they may bring to others. Of course it's important to respect yourself and make sure you are making authentic decisions that serve your soul, but it is just as important to think about how your actions may affect others. By thinking in this way, you realize that the potential benefit to others, and yourself for that matter, outweighs the fear of making a fool of yourself. We all have to learn to lighten up.

I find a helpful tool to push you into action is to ask yourself the next time you are afraid to act, what's stopping you and how does your inaction possibly affect other people? For example, when I first started writing openly to the public, in my blogs, in my articles, in my books, etc. I wondered if anyone was actually reading them. Then I thought this: what is my intention here? Well, it's to share with the world my research, experience, perspective, knowledge and channeled information, which have all helped me greatly in my own life. As a result of this revelation, I now have faith that as my words go out, the right people will be attracted to my writings as directed to me by the Universe. I've let go of any worries I had and I now feel at peace, knowing that somehow, in some way, the people who need to read what I write will find me.

I am so grateful to all those people who are reading what I have to say, and to any benefit they are receiving as a result. I know it is my purpose to proactively uplift and inspire, and even if I don't know exactly where all this will lead, I know with total certainty that it will all be great, and it already is.

So next time you feel afraid to take that action step, remember all those people, known and unknown to you, that you may be depriving if you don't act. Knowing your purpose means having the confidence to take action, even if you don't necessarily know where it will lead you. It's feeling passionate about what you are doing and using that love to spread more love to the world. Find out what you love to do, whether it's your career or a hobby or just the way you live your life, and use that passion to inspire other people. This is what is called a win/win situation.

Handling The Energy

2010-01-13T11:10:00.003-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

For some time now I have been feeling the presence of a new or enhanced energy. Until recently, I have been confused as to what has been going on with this energy and how I am personally being affected by it. Although I wasn't sure what it was, I had a feeling that it had something to do with cosmic energy shifts that I didn't know how to process or handle.

Lately, I started doing some research on the topic and found some information about what's been going on and why it's been affecting me as it has. What I learned so far is that there is a cosmic shift happening. I knew a bit about it before, but not much about the details. My recent anxiety prompted me to delve into this topic more deeply in order to uncover the means of handling this energy and making it work for me rather than against me.

The gist of it, as I understand it to date, is that we are experiencing an insurgence of Divine energy, or Light if you will. And this Light is basically illuminating and bringing to the surface our old patterns and fears that do not serve us well. This is an opportunity to use our own free will to release anything in our lives that causes us to fear, worry, stress or any other negative emotion under the sun. This energy is pure love and as it moves to us and through us, any resistance or conflict we have within (i.e. caused by our false ego beliefs), is trying to make its way out the door. The more we hold on to it, the more resistance we create. The more resistance we create, the more we feel this conflict as stress, anxiety, fear, insecurity and the like in our lives. I believe the key is to let your false beliefs go. Don't fight to hold on to them because they are not serving you or humanity well. By holding on to these fears, etc., you are only delaying your own fulfillment.

I believe that as we embrace this insurgence of energy and line up our own vibration to match it (i.e. being loving, respectful, happy...), that we will know how to handle this energy and use it for good. As we release our blockages and empty out our vessels of resistance, we will then be able to use this energy to create heaven on earth. This is our opportunity to realize the truth of our beings; that we are destined to be happy and fulfilled. This is an opportunity to come into our true Divine nature and release all those false beliefs caused by our egos. We are not lacking of anything. We have it all. We just don't realize it all the time. As such, now we can come into that truth and realize that we are provided for at all times. By releasing our lack mentality, which tells us there is not enough to go around and that we must fight for what is ours, we embrace the truth. And the truth is that there is infinite abundance of everything we could ever need and want, and all we have to do is embrace this truth, live it, and be kind and loving with ourselves and others.

While this information is certainly valuable, it is only as valuable to the degree that it is used. If you don't apply this information to make positive changes in your perceptions of the world, it won't be of much use. Instead of believing your fears and doubts about life, why not embrace the opposite as true? After all, all you have to lose are those insecurities, fears and doubts. If you are unhappy with these fears, etc. then why not try believing in something else?

Removing Agenda and Need for Taking Credit

2010-01-05T10:46:00.008-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

I am feeling very territorial today and I wanted to write about it to share with you why, and how I worked through it.

I've been writing for ezinearticles.com for a while now and today I discovered one of my articles copied into someone else's website. The ezinearticles.com publishing guidelines stipulate that if someone other than the author publishes an article on their own site or wherever, then they must include the author's name and all bio information, including links. However, although this person placed by byline on the article, they placed their name in front of mine and the article title, which makes it a bit confusing for readers, plus, none of my bio info was included.

My initial reaction was one of being peeved that someone would "steal" my article and not have the decency to include my information or link. Then I asked myself why I was feeling this way. Here's what I came up with:

I put my time and energy into writing an article that I thought would help people and the only condition for others to use it is to include my information along with it. I felt disrespected.

Then I thought, but I do not really "own" this information. I.e. essentially, it's out there in the Universe as energy and I simply channeled it through me and my writing. I am the channel, G-d is the source so really there's nothing to be territorial about. I realized that it was my ego talking and the need to take credit for my work.

I also realized that we all reap what we sow so it is not for me to worry about someone else's indiscretions and misguided actions. That's their problem. (For the sake of sharing, I did however include a comment on their website about where to find my original article.)

Then I thought about my initial motives for writing these free articles in the first place. One, it was to provide people with clear and valuable advice to implement into their own lives; for them to be benefited in some way through reading my articles. Two, I thought that by putting these articles out there, that perhaps it would increase my exposure as a writer, draw traffic to my websites (and other products and services that would be beneficial to people as well), and even maybe warrant the attention of people who could possibly help me publish my books.

Side note: I believe having the intention to help people and also wanting to be successful can work in harmony as long as one doesn't overcome the other. There needs to be a nice balance between giving and receiving. While your number one motive can certainly be sharing your gifts, following your passions and helping people, totally ignoring the monetary side of it may not always be wise. It really depends on your personality and what drives you most. For me, I have always felt very comfortable giving information and services away for free, and spent less time actually thinking about the financial side of things. So for me, it can be very wise to focus somewhat on the financial aspects as much as the other aspects. For others who obsess about making money, then perhaps it may be wise for them to balance that out with more focus on giving.

Then I thought, there is a reason for all this. Perhaps there is a need for me to protect my work for the sake of not encouraging this sort of behaviour in others, but if I don't know how, then I should just let it go. Perhaps it's to recognize any ego attachment I may have to my work and release the need for credit. Perhaps it's to speak up and do something proactive (that I know in the moment to do) about sharing my feelings with those who are perhaps misguided in their actions. Perhaps it's to take it as a compliment that others like my work so much that they feel the need to plagiarize. Perhaps it's to be grateful for being a channel for G-d's work and allowing G-d to decide where this work ends up, without my own agenda. Perhaps it's to focus on the work itself and let G-d handle the details of how it benefits others and myself as well.

So here I am, no longer peeved because I know that this was a great opportunity for me to take responsibility for my own emotions and to transform my thinking away from ego and towards enlightenment. This is what I would encourage you to do with anything that may be peeving you in your life, big or small. It's all about your own perceptions. By being honest with yourself, you can get to the root of the issue and yank it out permanently. It may take a little introspection, but believe me, the peace of mind and calm it brings you as a result is totally worth it. I mean, would you rather be feeling resentful about something and allowing it to suck all your energy, or would you prefer to feel free and happy? The choice is yours.

So to recap, here are some steps you can take to transform any negative emotions you may have into ones of enlightenment:

1) Identify the specific thing that is irritating you.
2) Ask yourself why you think you are irritated.
3) Ask yourself what possible lesson might be available here, and take responsibility for attracting whatever it is into your life (not from a self-blame point of view, but from a realization that your thoughts, feelings and actions emit a vibration that attract like things to you).
4) Identify any agenda you may have with respect to the issue. Is there something you are expecting, like praise, appreciation, recognition, domination, etc.?
5) Choose to forgive yourself and others. Know that like you, everyone is acting upon what they know best in the moment.
6) Realize there is a good reason for this issue being placed in your attention. You may not know what it is right away, but know there is something there to learn.
7) Find the silver lining. Find something for which to be grateful. See the bright side of the situation.
8) Change your perception and realize the truth, that your ego creates a false identity and that your soul is not bothered by fear, anger, worry, competition, and the like.
9) Realize that you can choose to let go and let G-d. You can choose to be happy and release your anger, resentment, fear, jealousy and any other ego emotions. You can choose to be an instrument for G-d and to not be attached to any "specific" outcome; to simply do what you are passionate about and let go of the rest of the details, simply acting on inspiration and out of love.
10) Lighten up. Don't take everything so seriously. Be introspective but don't over-analyze. You want to be a conscious creator, but you don't want to become your worst enemy.

Creating a Purpose Statement

2010-01-01T11:35:00.004-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

The one thing about finding your purpose and living it is that you often come across opportunities where you'll be asked to explain it. Now keep in mind, your explanation is not for approval-seeking purposes, but rather to help others understand your passions and how they can benefit from you.

In business this is called a mission statement. Professionally speaking, people will tend to ask you what you do, how you do it and in what way you are an expert at what you do.

Know this, by the very nature of who you are and your experiences, desires and passions in life you are already an expert at being you. Everyone is an expert in their own right and has something valuable to share with others. Never get intimidated by the question of why you are the best person for the job because no one can do what you do in the way that you do it. We each come from a unique perspective in life, and by that standard alone, we each are an expert in one way or another.

But to clarify for yourself, and in order to communicate it better to others, it can be very beneficial to create a purpose statement that demonstrates your passions and expresses what you have to share. In the book, "The Power of Focus," by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, and Les Hewitt, among other things, they talk about making purpose statements to clarify for yourself and others what drives you and how you intend to share your gifts with the world.

I'll use myself as an example:

My Purpose Statement: To proactively uplift people and help them live their best quality of life with purpose, joy and total fulfillment. To empower people to live out their dreams, and share their joy with the world. To help people help themselves. To be a consciousness-raiser. To be a leader. To be a positive example, demonstrating the joy of purposeful living and the fulfillment that this brings.

While this purpose statement certainly covers my professional aspirations, it also is a principle I can apply to every area of my life. I can take my natural talents for persuasion, processing, interpreting and effectively applying information, and communicating intuitively with people, and apply them in helping to uplift and inspire. This can relate to coaching my clients, putting this focus into my writing, infusing my conversations with purpose and positive intent, and even knowing it inside and sending out silent blessings as I go throughout my day.

So what are your natural talents? How can you use them to help others? Try to come up with your own purpose statement and always know that you are the best authority on yourself and your life, and that your experiences are unique to you and yours to share. We are all interconnected, and sharing with each other our unique expertise creates a harmonious exchange of energy that is collectively beneficial.

In my life so far, I have obviously had many unique experiences that have led me to where I am today. I have taken all of my education, research, and personal experiences and developed a system that when applied, truly works amazingly for me. I have taken my confusion about finding purpose and manifesting my dreams and transformed it into a clarified, easy to understand, simplified formula for dream manifestation and purposeful living. This is my unique combination that no one on this planet can exactly duplicate. My history; my destiny; my co-creation.

It's my purpose to share what I have learned and successfully applied into my own life, which I have taken great care to compile, tweak, and tailor in such a way that I believe is most effective. I apply it in my own life, I teach it to others through my coaching and writing, and I share it through my everyday consciousness, conversations and actions.

Find something that inspires you. Use your personal experiences, your passions and even your challenges to find out what you may have to share with the world. Create a purpose statement and live it to the best of your ability. Infuse this purpose into everything you do.

How Do I Promote?

2009-12-31T10:57:00.006-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

So today I had a thought, "how can I go about promoting my new blog?" My strategy was to simply pose the question and then let go and see what happens. Actually, this thought process was quite automatic and it all happened quite quickly.

So here's what happened. I started out searching for ways to advertise my blog. I googled it. That led me to various articles and websites that talked about forums, press releases, article writing and the like. While I'm already writing articles on ezinearticles.com, I had yet to explore forums and press releases. Well, what I found was a huge list of free press release sites that distribute your releases to various media outlets. How great is that? And here's the lesson about why nothing happens in vain: a while back I took some PR courses (and I means years ago) and one of my favorite classes was the writing class (surprise, surprise). However, in this writing class I learned how to construct a proper press release. And now here I am needing this skill to create a press release for my blog. Never underestimate the power of synchronicity. All of your skills, experiences, even challenges are there to provide you with something valuable. There is a reason for everything regardless of whether or not you are aware of it right now.

It's great, by posing the question and then being proactive about taking the obvious action, I've been easily led to a means for publicity I had not thought of before. This is what it means to let go and let G-d. It means to trust that there is a way and that you will find it somehow. Then, when you are guided in a certain direction, you take action on it and then let go of that as well. There's no use getting frustrated or overwhelmed because you don't know which road to take. Just take one step at a time, that's all you really have to do.

Embrasing Vulnerability

2009-12-30T23:36:00.006-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

OK, so I'm having a bit of a freak out moment again. I am feeling a bit vulnerable putting my intimate thoughts out there. But I recently realized, though, that clamming up and keeping things to myself may be what has been blocking me.

I've never been much of a bragger. I've always been a pretty humble person. Confident, but not boastful. But now I realize that maybe I was taking it to an extreme. Maybe at some point it became more about fear of being vulnerable and less about being humble.

In light of this fear, putting my "progress report" out into cyberspace does feel a bit uncomfortable. What I've realized, however, is that the motivation behind what you say or do is as important as what you say or do. For instance, by documenting and sharing my progress and positive experience here in this blog, I am not doing it out of an ego need to brag, validate or seek approval. Actually, I am doing it thinking that if this helps someone, somewhere, anywhere, get off their behinds and start taking action in their own lives, then this slight ego discomfort is worth it and I'll get over it.

When you share your joyous experiences with others, consider your motivations. Figure out if they are more rooted in ego or in spirit. For me, my intention is not to brag about my achievements, but rather to share my joy, and proactively inspire others.

My goal here is to step outside my comfort zone, embrace the vulnerability, open myself up to sharing with others, keep myself moving forward, and hopefully help people along the way. This vulnerability is somewhat of a new experience for me. I've tended to keep my feelings close to my chest, but I've realized that this hasn't served me well. Over the last year or so, I've really embraced the expression of my feelings, and as a result, it has opened a lot of doors for me. I am embracing a new attitude. I know now that expressing your feelings is not a sign of weakness but rather a sign of empowerment. So I will continue to share with whomever is reading this so that you too can make positive changes in your life and maybe step outside your comfort zone to create something miraculous.

Practicing What You Preach

2009-12-30T22:10:00.004-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

It's so interesting that as soon as I put my latest intentions out there and as soon as I've gotten serious about taking consistent action towards my goals, amazing synchronicities have started to occur. For a while I had been telling people about the amazing principles for living your life on purpose and manifesting your dreams, and I would watch as my advice would help many people. But only now am I starting to really implement it myself. As a result I already feel the energy shifting and the positive momentum growing.

It's so important as a teacher that your practice what you preach. For many years I had been trying to figure out the formula to success, and really I already had it, I just wasn't using it to the fullest potential. With my first book that will be coming out in e-book format shortly, it was like a flash of channeled information came to me and it just felt so right. I was inspired and motivated to put down on paper the key tools and techniques that I had learned and experienced, and now am personally implementing with great success.

Progress report: Today I received a call from a new potential client from an ad that was placed about a year ago. I also received an email from a publishing company about potentially working with them to put my books into print. Mind you I am not sure of the details but that's not the point. To me it's an indication of this momentum shift, and that my platform is growing and getting stronger and more visible.

I am so grateful and excited. I know that just because I don't always know the reasons for certain occurrences, that it doesn't mean there isn't a good one. I know that as I go with the flow, one step at a time and without trying to figure everything out in advance, that this action will joyously take me where I need to go.

The Importance Of Acting On Opportunties

2009-12-29T14:31:00.005-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

One of my intentions is to meet my soulmate and get married. In order to do that I need to make sure that I have released any resistance I may have towards that desire. This got me thinking...

In order to receive what it is that you desire in life, you must be open to opportunities, even if their relevance isn't crystal clear in the moment, and then be willing to act on them despite your fears and doubts.

For me, I used to be commitment phobic, and this underlined all my relationships for a long time. When I finally decided that I did want to get married, I still had to make sure I didn't still have subconscious beliefs that contradicted my desire.

If you don't uncover your subconscious beliefs, you can have a desire and think you're doing everything right in attracting it, but really, you're still resisting it. This resistance creates a lack of alignment between your thoughts, feelings, beliefs and actions, thus, hindering your manifestation process.

How does this relate to me and my desire to meet and marry my soulmate? Well, I've created a list of criteria that I desire in a partner (check) and I've even decided that I am ready to commit to this type of relationship (check), but I also had to learn to be open to opportunities, even if they didn't exactly fit my expectations in the moment.

Interestingly enough, as soon as I came to this decision, I've been offered a plethora of matchmaking opportunities all at once and from totally different sources. It's like as soon as I became open, the world of opportunities opened up for me. Before I would refuse to go out with guys based on my pre-judgements. Now I realize that whether or not there's a romantic connection, there is a reason for the introduction and there must be something we have to share with one another. Plus, by following through on these opportunities, I believe it shows the universe that I am serious and committed to my intention. It's all about accountability.

The Universe sends us opportunities, and even though we may not always know what the relevance is to our desires, we can trust that there is some connection. The only way we'll ever truly know is if we act on it. So, if it feels right intuitively, even if your ego protests, then take the leap, you'll never know unless you try. That's what I'm doing. I'll keep you posted on my progress. :-)

Why Am I Doing This?

2009-12-29T13:56:00.008-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

I have to admit, I had a small freak out moment today about doing this blog. I thought, "Why am I putting it all out there like this, what am I nuts? I've never been very good at being vulnerable, and here I am putting out into cyberspace my most intimate hopes and dreams."

Then I realized this: while I feel a bit uncomfortable with this whole vulnerability thing, I know that it's good for me so I'm doing it in spite of my fear. I'm doing it not just to keep myself accountable for taking consistent action towards my goals, but also because I believe it may inspire others out there to take action towards living their own dreams.

Then I started thinking about all the material I've read about the importance of keeping your intentions private. And here I am, broadcasting them into the cyber world for all to read. But I've never been one to blindly follow rules and so here is my thinking: If you talk about your intentions and desires from an authentic place that's more soul motivated than ego motivated, then there is no reason why your intentions can't manifest. Only if you are heavily dependant upon the opinions and approval of others does voicing your desires become a risky affair. Why? Because when you allow the opinions of others to dictate your belief in yourself and your dreams, then you become vulnerable to outside influences and this is what limits your manifestations, i.e. your doubt in yourself.

If you are thick-skinned, so to speak, and believe in yourself and your dreams no matter what others may think or say, then sharing your passions with others can be inspiring for them and liberating for you.

It's not about boasting or trying to convince yourself or other people of your abilities, but rather sharing your desires and involving yourself fully in the creative process. Plus, when you utter the words, it suddenly becomes more real to you.

A lot of people I've met have been afraid of vocalizing their dreams out of superstition and fear of "evil eye." But if the reason you do or don't do something is out of superstition, it's the superstition itself that limits you. And it limits you because of the doubt and fear it creates in you. Your beliefs are what drive what's possible for you. And if you live in fear and superstition, these beliefs will dictate your level of achievement, or rather, lack thereof.

So here I am, exposing my dreams to the world, and as scary as it seems, I know it's the beginning of something really good. My hope is that my courage to ask for what I want and do something about it is something that inspires you to do the same.

Here's to going outside our comfort zones!

My Intentions

2009-12-26T23:51:00.014-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

Intentions are powerful things. They get you motivated and keep you on track, as long as you follow through of course. I feel that focusing on the essence of what you want, finding that you already have it within, and letting it go to the universe to deliver, is the most proactive and powerful route you can take. Intentions are born of desires and desires at their core are born out of inspiration, guidance and purpose. We are creative beings and as such, we desire. The key is not to squash desire, but to know your motives and act out of your most authentic place.

OK, with that said, I want to put my own intentions out there. Feel free to ask me about my progress as I go to it. Oh, and by the way, some of my intentions are quite specific, but behind them all I am letting go to the universe to deliver to me the best means of manifestation (i.e. I am not attached to the specifics).

One, I intend to finish my book on living your life on purpose (The Purpose Book). Once I've finished it, I intend to have it published. I intend to meet all the right and best people to help me achieve this and other goals. I don't quite know how yet, but that part isn't as important right now. The key thing is that I know what I want and I know what I have to say has great value; I needn't concern myself with the how at this point.

Hay House is certainly one of my favorite publishing houses...just putting it out there. ;-) And I would love a forward from Dr. Wayne Dyre (I mean, who wouldn't?) as he is a joy as an author and I just love his books and lectures and movie. Actually, funny thing, one of the first books of his that I read was "Manifest Your Destiny" and when I turned to the copyright, etc. page, there I saw my first initial and last name: D. Nudelman. It was the name of the cover designer, but to me, it was a sign that I was headed in the right direction; a pleasant synchronicity that made me believe that one day I would be a published author and possibly also meet Dr. Dyre in person...we'll see...

I intend to continue to write great books that proactively inspire millions upon millions of people world-wide to take action towards manifesting their own dreams; to show them how implementing the tools I've learned about and taught thus far can lead them to living on purpose, living with happiness, joy and authenticity, and successfully manifesting the life of their dreams. (I have total faith, and a passionate yet relaxed attitude, knowing somehow it will all work out for the best interests of all.)

I also intend to consistently be on the New York Times Best Sellers list as a best selling author.

Two, once my books are published, I intend for each to be number one on the New York Times Best Sellers List. I want to get the word out as I see it about not only the importance of living your life on purpose, but also on how to do it. I also want to proactively inspire as many people as possible to live the life of their dreams and not be afraid to do so.

I intend to create and maintain a professional profile as a successful writer/author/speaker/coach and overall entrepreneur. I intend to proactively uplift and inspire others to live their lives on purpose and to be co-creators of their experiences.

Three, I intend to find a healthy balance with my "work" (and the quotes are there because I really love what I do), and my personal life/family life, and all other areas of my life.

Four, I intend to meet my soulmate, get married, and have a healthy fun relationship where we respect and support each other's independence and creativity. I intend to have total faith in meeting the right man at the perfect time.

I intend to continue making my decisions out of authenticity and integrity rather than settling out of fear, doubt, worry or due to pressure's from other people's opinions, standards or limiting beliefs. I intend to make my decisions out of choice rather than need.

Five, I intend to get my butt to the gym and work out regularly like I used. I intend to make time for myself and respect my personal needs, because I know that when I am happy and healthy I have so much more to share with others.

Six, I intend to travel with my family and friends and for us to share wonderful experiences together.

Seven, I intend to manifest joyous financial freedom and prosperity for me and my family, which among other things, will provide the capital to fund projects I am passionate about, (some of which include education and seminar centers that provide people with a supportive and happy environment where they can nurture their dreams and learn the art of purposeful living and manifestation, host a radio show and possibly create uplifting positive TV projects to counter all the negative media out there today).

I also want my proactive financial freedom and prosperity to prove that living spiritually and on purpose can and does mean having a balanced relationship with the material world too, whereby we enjoy and share G-d's beautiful creations in many physical forms. Everything is made of energy/spirit and it is my intention to demonstrate that living a spiritual life does not mean giving up the material world, but rather recognizing the spirituality in everything and everyone. It's about having an overall high quality of life that harmonizes all areas of life beautifully.

Eight, I intend to follow my intuition and let go to guidance with certainty and faith. I intend to trust my gut. I intend to go with the flow and let myself be guided without trying to control every detail all the time or trying to constantly figure out how everything will come together. I intend to let go and let G-d.

Nine, I intend to have a beautiful place on the beach (which I share with my loved-ones) where I relax, marvel at the perfection of nature, take in the sights, sounds, tastes, smells, and textures, and take in the beautiful energy. I intend to take long walks on the beach, swim in the turquoise ocean, and connect with my spirit through meditation, contemplation and reflection.

I'll be adding intentions as I go...so stay tuned. Feel free to share your intentions too.

To Manifesting Our Dreams!

2009-12-26T23:43:00.005-05:00

By: Dora Nudelman

I've started this blog for several reasons. Firstly, I want to give myself a tool to hold myself accountable for following through on my newest resolutions and intentions. I feel by writing about it here, I will not only motivate myself to do what I need to do, but I will hopefully inspire others to do the same.

Secondly, I strongly believe that living your life on purpose is one of the most important and fulfilling things you can do. It spills over into every area of life and creates amazing opportunities, some of which I intend to write about here.

Thirdly, I want to create a forum for others to share their experiences of purposeful manifestations, as well as provide a creative and sharing place for those people who feel lost and confused about what their own purpose is in life. Whether you already live your life with purpose, or you simply need some guidance, I hope this blog will proactively inspire you to start and continue to live the life of your dreams.

Fourthly, I want to personally implement some of the tools from my book: "The Purpose Book. From Inspiration, to Action to Manifestation. 10 Steps to Finding Your Purpose, Following Through, and Living The Life Of Your Dreams." I know these tools work, I've seen them in action, I've coached people through them, I've lived them myself, and now I'm taking it to the next level, sharing it all with you, whomever you are, in hopes to inspire you to also live your life with passion, purpose, joy and fulfillment.

So let's do this together and see what happens, yes?

To our success. Until next time...